Healing Hurts :: SELF-HATRED

 

This idea of Self-Hatred sounds strange when you think about it.

Who is going to admit, out loud, to another person, that they hate themselves? Some will, but not most. In fact, millions of women secretly do hate themselves.

OK, we may not hate everything about ourselves. But can you honestly say you like more about yourself that you dislike? There was a time when my answer to that question was definitely no.

Self-hate often starts in childhood with negative messages spoken or unspoken by our family of origin. The culture, media and our peers encourage this monster who whispers the negative, critical words we hear over and over in our minds. Guilt and shame top it off till we’re overwhelmed with emotions and feelings; the pain becomes so deep it’s impossible to express it in words.

Is there no relief? No release?

What we do with this insidious pain will vary.

How will you act out the negativity rolling around in your head?

For some their self-hatred takes on non-direct, often hidden behaviors like extreme risk-taking, substance abuse, eating disorders, gambling, and promiscuity. For others their self-hatred is more direct and visible with self-harm acted out by skin cutting, skin branding, hair pulling or other forms of self-injury.

What can we say to those we know and love who struggle with this increasingly popular practice? 

How can we communicate to them that they truly deserve to be loved, not just by other people, but by God and most importantly by themselves?

Let’s start by watching these two videos below. I think they have all the answers we need.

God Loves YOU!  http://youtu.be/aLHsQF131HQ

 

If you are reaching for hope and help, I urge you to contact a licensed Christian counselor in your area for personal assistance in overcoming this problem. If you don’t know where to find one, contact a pastor who can help you locate an expert. All the anxiety and problems you are facing can be overcome.

 

BOOK REVIEW :: Healing is a Choice by Stephen Arterburn




                      

Healing is a Choice: 
Ten Decisions That Will Transform Your Life and 
Ten Lies That Can Prevent You From Making Them

by @SteveArterburn
Thomas Nelson Publishers 225pp

I had originally planned to review a different book for August, but had problems with the digital photo of the cover. So at the last minute before publishing my monthly preview, I decided, or rather, God decided, this was the book I was supposed to read. I’ve been reading Stephen Arterburn’s work for many years. His books always bring conviction and comfort and this one was no disappointment.

Let’s start with these challenging words from the author:

I am asking you to give up your life as you know it so that you can find the life God has for you. Take hold of your future today and make the choices that will lead to your healing. ~ Stephen Arterburn

With touching personal stories, Mr. Arterburn shows us why we should refuse the lies we’ve been believing and how to make needed changes that will bring healing if we choose to do the work. As always, it’s our choice whether we want to be healed or not.

Here is a sample:

  1. The Choice to Connect Your Life: We must branch out from the “I only need God” mentality; take a healing risk to connect with others who can help us experience life to the fullest.
  2. The Choice to Feel Your Life: We must press past the habit of numbing ourselves. Once we can define and acknowledge our feelings true healing can begin.
  3. The Choice to Investigate Your Life in Search of Truth: Take an honest look at your life in the past, where you are today and where it is leading for the future.
  4. The Choice to Heal Your Future: When we stop dragging our past into our future we lose weight that slows us down and can rob us of a healthy future.
  5. The Choice to Help Your Life: By choosing to reach outside ourselves we can help ourselves have the life God desires for us.
 
Healing is a Choice is full of valuable information that can help anyone no matter the life situation. As I said before, Stephen Arterburn’s books always help me. Even when I wasn’t looking for help, God knew what I needed. You may think you’ve got life figured out, but God may surprise you like He did me.
Buy Healing is a Choice.
You won’t be sorry!