Reaching Hurting Women Ministries

Hi Friends! Welcome to Episode 14 of the Reaching Hurting Women Podcast: A Contemplative Path of Recovery. Here we are learning new ways of coping with our daily struggles. My name is Tamara and I will be your host. Today we are talking about: Contemplative Practices

As I stated in the introduction here at Reaching Hurting Women we are taking a Contemplative Path to Recovery. By that I mean we are using contemplative spiritual practices to help us cope with the challenges of not only addiction recovery but also the challenges that come with every day life in general. 

What are contemplative spiritual practices? Well they are ways where we can be intentional and deliberate about matters of the soul. They are tools that help us become more aware of God’s presence in our normal life; they inject the sacred into activities that might otherwise be ordinary. By applying contemplative spirituality we can take anything we might be doing: like cleaning house or gardening for instance, and turn them into a sacred spiritual experience.

Contemplative prayer is at the heart of the spiritual practices where we open ourselves to the mystery of Jesus Christ. What we are talking about is taking the essence of contemplative prayer and applying it to other activities so that we are keeping God’s presence at the center of whatever we are doing.

Now let’s talk about the different categories of contemplative practices and the various activities included in them. I have Eight Categories of Contemplative Practices and the different activities in each of the categories. I’m not going to go into detail about most of them, because we will be learning more about many of them in the months to come. But this will give you a nice overview of contemplative practices. As I list them off, be thinking about how you can apply these activities and practices to help you cope with your daily struggles. Let’s get started…

1. Stillness Practices: Connecting with God in quiet reflection.

• Silence
• Centering Prayer
• Meditation
• The Jesus Prayer
• Lectio-Divina
• The Daily Examen
• Breath Prayers
• Journaling

2. Movement Practices: Connecting with God through your body in motion.

• Walking Meditation
• Yoga
• Tai Chi
• Dance
• Sports
• Labyrinth walking
• Pilgrimage

3. Creative Practices: Connecting with God through creative expression.

• Painting
• Writing
• Gardening
• Sewing/Knitting
• Sculpting
• Music/Singing/Chanting
• Cooking
• Calligraphy

4. Relational Practices: Connecting with God by being present with others.

• Worship
• Visiting
• Listening
• Communion
• Conversations
• Telling Stories
• Volunteering

5. Learning Practices: Connecting with God through intellectual exploration and discovery.

• Reading the Bible
• Studying Christian Doctrine
• Studying Christian Church History
• Reading inspiring books
• Having Theological Conversation

6. Influencing Practices: Connecting with God as an agent for change.

• Voting
• Attending a protest
• Coaching
• Teaching
• Leading a team
• Writing a letter

7. Serving Practices: Connecting with God by sharing your gifts and resources.

• Feeding the hungry
• Giving blood
• Serving your neighbor
• Giving / Pledging Money

8. Ritual Practices: Connecting with God through ceremonial, cultural, religious traditions.

• Sabbath
• Sabbatical
• Retreats
• Liturgy of the Hours
• Creating a Sacred space
• Building an altar
• Pilgrimage

This list is designed to help you get started with your own contemplative practices. Remember, our goals are to connect with God in the midst of our activities. That means anything we do can become a contemplative practice if we have God at the center.

Quickly, let’s talk about some of the benefits of contemplative practices.

1. We will begin to experience inner peace.
2. Our life will be better balanced.
3. We will find more purpose and meaning in life.
4. We will have a healthier perspective on life.
5. Our recovery will take on deeper meaning.

When we are walking a healthier spiritual path not only will our life be better, those in our circle of influence will be better too.

Thanks so much for joining me today on the Reaching Hurting Women Podcast: A Contemplative Path of Recovery. Here we are learning new ways of coping with our daily struggles. I hope you have enjoyed our discussion on the Contemplative Practices. We will be diving more in these topics over the next few weeks and months. I look forward to hearing from you. You can leave comments or questions below the show notes. Please take a few minutes and check out the other columns and resources at ReachingHurtingWomen.com. Until next time may the grace and peace of God be yours.

Resources

Trinity Luthern

The Big Book of Christian Mysticism by Carl McColman

Hi Friends! Welcome to Episode 13 of the Reaching Hurting Women Podcast: A Contemplative Path of Recovery. Here we are learning new ways of coping with our daily struggles. My name is Tamara and I will be your host. Today we are talking about: Freewill Sacrifice 

There are many places in scripture that talk about sacrifice. In the Old Testament when sacrifices were a part of the worship culture, Psalm 51:17 tells us that God wants a broken and contrite spirit rather than a burnt offering as a sacrifice. Later the Psalmist says:

With a freewill offering I will sacrifice to you; I will give thanks to your name O LORD, for it is good. ~ Psalm 54:6

In our culture and busy life today how can we offer God a free-will sacrifice? What does our freewill have to do with sacrifice anyway? What is it that I can sacrifice to God?

For me it’s not just about giving up the negative dependencies: substances or addictions that I crave. What about our lifestyle, our creature comforts: social media, TV, magazines, activities, people, places… I’m asking myself lately: What am I benefiting spiritually from the things I am spending my time on?

I ran across a quote during one my devotions the other day that sparked this podcast. Jean-Pierre de Caussade writes in his classic book The Sacrament of the Present Moment:

Faith is strengthened, increased and enriched by those things that escape the senses; the less there is to see, the more there is to believe.

In other words, the five-sensory-over-load, that most of us live with on a regular basis, impairs our spiritual growth! The more we are using our physical senses: smelling, touching, hearing, tasting, seeing; the weaker our spiritual senses will be.

Do you ever find yourself looking at someone wishing you could have what they have? Not in a jealous way, but just wanting to be able to maybe have that kind of job? Who are the spiritual giants that you look up to? Teachers? Authors? We have ask ourselves if we are willing to do what they did to get what they got.

Friends, life is short and getting shorter by the day. I am getting serious about the input that I am allowing into my brain and body. There are things I want to accomplish before I die and they aren’t going to happen if I continue to waste precious minutes, hours and days.

In his letter to the Romans Saint Paul urges us to offer our bodies as a living sacrifice to God as an act of worship. Again in his first letter to the Corinthian church Paul says:

All things are lawful but not all things are helpful. All things are lawful, but not all things build up. ~ 1 Cor 10:23

At one time there were so many rules that the Jewish people had to follow, what to eat, things they could and couldn’t do on certain days and times. Saint Paul is telling us that yes, now those things that once were against the religious law are no longer against God’s law. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are good for us to do.

I have the freedom to watch television all day on Sunday if I choose. But is that beneficial? I have the freedom to eat or drink anything I want to. But is that good for my body?

Is what I am seeing, smelling, hearing, touching, tasting… beneficial in the long run, not only for my physical well being, but for my spiritual health as well?

Free will is serious business, and a huge responsibility. Our free will allows us the ability to own, even change our fate in some cases, though we have no possible way of knowing the potential outcome.

It’s not about whether something is good or bad, moral or immoral, a sin or not. It’s about getting God’s blessing. It’s about what’s best for my life in the eternal scheme of things.

Thanks so much for joining me today on the Reaching Hurting Women Podcast: A Contemplative Path of Recovery. Here we are learning new ways of coping with our daily struggles. I hope you will check out the other columns and resources at ReachingHurtingWomen.com. Until next time may the grace and peace of God be yours.

Hi Friends! Welcome to Episode Eleven of the Reaching Hurting Women Podcast: A Contemplative Path of Recovery where we are learning new ways of coping with our daily struggles. My name is Tamara and I will be your host. Today we are talking about: Temptation.

The Bible tells us that there is no temptation that is not common to man. In other words, we all are tempted. And really we should be glad we are tempted because that means we are doing something right!

There’s another way to look at temptation. What if God allowed temptations to come our way as a dry run, a practice session as it were, a learning opportunity, to see what areas of weakness we have that need to be worked on.

If a donut in the office break room has so much power that I can’t resist eating it, that’s a serious weakness that needs attention.

If before we give in to that donut, or that drink, or that cigarette, fill in the blank with what area you struggle with today… If before we give in to our temptation, we roll the movie all the way to the end, we can see what potential disaster could be waiting after our decision to give in to that temptation.

Each temptation is a dress rehearsal, an opportunity through which we are able to learn without physically going through with the behavior. The challenge is, will we actually take the time to roll that movie all the way to the end? Will we step back from our emotions, our physical cravings, and learn without having to get burned.

Temptations show us what we have allowed to have power over our lives. In some cases, these areas of weakness have become idols in our lives.

If I’m spending too much time thinking about having a drink of alcohol, those thoughts will eventually give birth to that action. In that case, my desires were allowed to grow because I let them grow. We must think about what we are thinking about.

Temptations aren’t just about where we go, or what we do, although they play a part. Many temptations begin right in our mind, in our imagination.

Rather that allowing our imagination to grow the desire into the action, let’s use our imagination to see what pain and heartache that desire can cause if we give in to it.

Let use the power of temptation to make a conscious decision and learn without going through the painful consequences.

Thanks so much for joining me today on the Reaching Hurting Women Podcast: A Contemplative Path of Recovery where we are learning new ways of coping with our daily struggles. I hope you will check out the other columns and resources at ReachingHurtingWomen.com this week. Until next time may the grace and peace of God be yours.

Hi Friends! Welcome to Episode Ten of the Reaching Hurting Women Podcast: A Contemplative Path of Recovery where we are learning new ways of coping with our daily struggles. My name is Tamara and I will be your host. This week we are talking about: The Examen

For many years I’ve used the monthly calendar to direct my ongoing study of the 12 Steps of recovery: In January with Step One we admit that we are powerless over our dependencies. In February’s Step 2 we come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can restore our sanity. For March in Step 3 we decided to turn our life and will over to God’s care. For April Step 4 brings us to a time of reflecting as we take a fearless moral inventory of ourselves. In May’s Step 5, we confessed our wrongs to God, ourselves and another person. In June’s Step 6 we are ready for God to remove all our defects of character. For July and Step 7 we humbly ask God to remove our shortcomings. In August Step 8 calls for us to make a list of those we have harmed and to become willing to make amends to them all. Then in September and Step 9 we make our amends wherever it is possible. And now with the tenth month of October, we are focusing on Step 10, which reads:

We continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

Step 10 is a continuation of Step 4’s life inventory, but it’s to be done ongoing. How we take our ongoing inventory varies from person to person. Some like to keep a running inventory throughout the day; others, maybe take it in the morning and evening. Then there are those who like a seasonal weekend retreat for more in-depth inventory work

When we keep our inventory ongoing throughout the day, it helps keep our amends list short. This is a great use of the Notes app on a Smartphone. We can quickly jot down when we were short with our spouse on the phone at lunch. Then we won’t forget to apologize later at home.

Our Daily Inventory can also be more private at the end of the day by taking a few minutes to journal about the times where we might have harmed someone or acted in anger. However, we mustn’t forget to keep our inventory balanced also noting the things we did right that day. Our journal helps us have a record so when needed we can make amends as soon as possible.

There are many who like to take mini-retreats, to spend some time alone with God to pray and read over their journal entries. This is a great time to celebrate your victories and also see where you can improve over the next three months.

In the Christian Contemplative tradition there is another type of inventory. Saint Ignatius instituted The Prayer of Examen more than 400 years ago. The Examen is a technique of prayerful refection over the events of our day designed to detect God’s presence and discern His direction and guidance for us. There are many books and articles written with different versions and various ideas how to use The Examen. Today I want to give you a brief overview and a sample of the version that I like to use.

In his Spiritual Exercises, St. Ignatius of Loyola, urges everyone to be taught The Examen, daily examining of our deepest desires and feelings. Ignatius calls our feelings consolations and desolations.

Consolations: connect us with God, others and ourselves.

Desolations: disconnect us from God, others and ourselves.

Ignatius believed that God would speak to us through our feelings and desires bringing about revelation and change. Ignatius adds our need for God’s grace. We aren’t resolving to perfect ourselves by the force of our own will. We are resolving to open ourselves to God’s grace through awareness of where we need His grace.

At the foundation of The Examen is gratitude. Ignatius knew that our awareness of God’s goodness would keep our relationship with God healthy. And if our relationship with God is healthy, our relationships with others and ourselves will be healthy also.

As we work our way through the steps of The Examen we prayerfully review our thoughts, feelings, and actions for today. Our goal is to become aware of hidden motivations that cause the behaviors that need changing. When we become aware of the unconscious motivations that interfere with our healthy intentions, we will be less likely to be dragged into the thoughts, feelings or actions that we want to avoid.

To begin our time of Examen we will set aside a few minutes alone with God. I prefer to do my Examen at the end of the day, just before bed. Some like to do the Examen twice a day, once at lunchtime and then again at the end of the day.

In my version of The Examen there are three steps. Now let’s breath in and prayerfully, slowly begin.

Step 1: Ask God to bring to your awareness the moment today for which you are most grateful.

• If you could relive one moment, which one would it be?
• When were you most able to give and receive love today?
• Ask yourself what was said and done in that moment that made it so good.
• Breath in the gratitude you felt and receive life again from that moment.

Step 2: Ask God to bring to your awareness the moment today for which you are least grateful.

• When were you least able to give and receive love today?
• Ask yourself what was said and done in that moment that made it so difficult.
• Relive the moment and the feelings without trying to change or fix them in any way.
• Take deep breaths and let God’s love fill you just as you are.

Step 3: Give thanks for what you have experienced. If possible, share these two moments with a friend.

The recovery community has a slogan, “One Day at a Time” by which they mean that sobriety isn’t achieved in a big resolution, but by trying to stay sober for one day – today.

It’s useful to look at our spiritual life in that same way… one day at a time. In The Examen we are only looking at today, asking God to reveal to us areas where we failed and where we didn’t, where we loved and where we didn’t. Going forward we prayerfully expect tomorrow for God to graciously give us the desire to change and the power to carry it out.

Thanks so much for joining me today on the Reaching Hurting Women Podcast: A Contemplative Path of Recovery where we are learning new ways of coping with our daily struggles. I hope you will check out ReachingHurtingWomen.com this week as we continue to discuss our theme topic of The Examen.

Until next time may the grace and peace of God be yours.