Category: Spiritual Growth

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A Monk in the World

 

EACH MONTH IN A MONK IN THE WORLD WE ARE LEARNING THE PRINCIPLES OF CHRISTIAN MONASTICISM AND HOW WE CAN APPLY THEM TO OUR LIVES OUTSIDE THE MONASTERY WALLS. Our focus this month is on Hospitality.

 

All guests who present themselves are to be welcomed as Christ, for He Himself will say: I was a stranger and you welcomed me.  (Matt 25:35; The Rule of Benedict 53:1)

Much of our entertaining today is focused on impressing others. Fearfully, we work ourselves into a frenzy cleaning, decorating, buying this and that, and creating extravagant recipes, all in the hopes of being approved by our guests.

…only those who are truly at home in themselves can offer genuine hospitality, which is not controlling or manipulative, but welcomes us as we are. ~ Kathleen Norris*

Benedictine hospitality has two simple goals: 

Did they see Christ in me? Did I see Christ in them?

  • Benedictine hospitality is about others, not us.
  • Benedictine hospitality calls for balance and self-care. 
  • Benedictine hospitality includes the forgotten and poor in our world.
  • Benedictine hospitality means caring for the earth God has given us.

Sometimes hospitality shows up at inconvenient times. Without hostility, we must see the interruption as a call to serve others and our world lovingly.  This is our chance to practice obedience in responding to God’s call.

Welcome one another just as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God. ~ Rom 15:7

Hospitality is an incredible gift that we can give one another.  It all begins when we can be truly present to another person. When we are present, focusing on the person before us or acknowledging the need of people who live far from us, we become channels for the Spirit of Christ. ~ Jane Tomaine**

When we are struggling with our own problems and drowning in our own negativity one of the best things we can do is take our mind off our self. We need to lean back and make a space for hospitality. By keeping our eyes, ears and hearts open we will be ready for what God leads us to do.

RESOURCES: 
The Benedictine Handbook Liturgical Press 2003*
Benedict’s Way: An Ancient Monks Insights for a Balanced Life by Lonni Pratt and Fr. Daniel Homan
How to be a Monastic and Not Leave Your Day Job: An Invitation to Oblate Life by Benet Tvedten
Monk Habits for Everyday People: Benedictine Spirituality for Protestants by Dennis Okholm
St. Benedict’s Toolbox: The Nuts and Bolts of Everyday Benedictine Living by Jane Tomaine**
Seeking God: The Way of St. Benedict by Esther de Waal

Image credit: yencha / 123RF Stock Photo
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12 Steps of Humility


EACH MONTH IN THE 12 STEPS OF HUMILITY WE ARE CLIMBING SAINT BENEDICT’S LADDER OF HUMILITY.  WITH EACH RUNG WE COME CLOSER TO THE PERFECT LOVE OF GOD.

The ladder is our life on earth, if we humble our heart God will raise it to heaven. ~ St. Benedict 
 
 

THE TENTH STEP OF HUMILITY: 

A monk is not given to ready laughter.

A fool raises [her] voice when [she] laughs. ~ Sirach 21:20

Today’s humor leaves much to be desired. The stand-up comic routines and movie humor are often sarcastic, mean and usually at the expense of others. This is what Saint Benedict is referring to when he asks us to avoid excessive laughter.

Humor allows us to see life from the lighter side. Laughter on the other hand is an emotional expression which, for many years, was looked down upon in the upper classes of society. It was considered to be a lack of self-control and vulgar.

The prideful use this negative, hurtful humor to hide their weaknesses. Avoiding their own internal pain, they use arrogant jokes to make themselves look better than others.

In the Tenth Step of Humility, Saint Benedict encourages us to take our humor very seriously. We must guard our laughter taking care not to use it in a hurtful way. 

The humble person cultivates a soul in which everyone is safe. ~ Joan Chittister*

 
RESOURCES:
The Rule of Benedict: A Spirituality for the 21st Century by Joan Chittister*
Twelve Steps to Inner Freedom: Humility Revisited by Joan Chitister
The Twelve Steps of Humility and Pride by Bernard of Clairvaux
St. Benedicts’s Toolbox: The Nuts and Bolts of Everyday Benedictine Living by Jane Tomaine
The Rule of Saint Benedict Edited by Timothy Fry
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12 Steps of Humility :: LEARN FROM OTHERS

EACH MONTH IN THE 12 STEPS OF HUMILITY WE ARE CLIMBING SAINT BENEDICT’S LADDER OF HUMILITY.  WITH EACH RUNG WE COME CLOSER TO THE PERFECT LOVE OF GOD.

The ladder is our life on earth, if we humble our heart God will raise it to heaven. ~ St. Benedict 

THE EIGHTH STEP OF HUMILITY: The monk does only what is endorsed by the common rule of the monastery and the example set by [her] superiors.


Without good direction, people lose their way; the more wise counsel you follow, the better your chances. ~ Proverbs 11:14 (MSG)

It’s difficult to find young people who respect, listen and learn from adults.  In the 1970’s, my generation of youth, no one over the age of 40 was to be trusted much less respected.

We can’t just pick on the young, many adults are hesitant to learn from others. We think we’ve got life all figured out and don’t need advice from anyone. 

The ability to learn from others is a sign that we are at ease with ourselves. If we’ve worked The Seventh Step of Humility, found and accepted our own weaknesses, then we are well positioned to learn from those around us. 

The eighth degree of humility brings us to such respect for others that we can follow the great rather than get lost making the path as we go. ~ Joan Chittister*

Those who are unteachable are usually not concerned with their spiritual growth.  That’s why I must regularly examine the “pride” barometer of my heart. 

Am I blindly walking the same path over and over again? 

Am I willing to asks others for direction?



RESOURCES:
Twelve Steps to Inner Freedom: Humility Revisited by Joan Chittister*
A Guide to Living in the Truth: Saint Benedict’s Teaching on Humility by Michael Casey
Saint Benedict’s Toolbox: The Nuts and Bolts of Everyday Benedictine Living by Jane Tomaine
The Rule of Saint Benedict edited by Timothy Fry


Image credit: andresr / 123RF Stock Photo

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Love Pays the Rent

Despite the Sonny and Cher 60’s song… 

Love does pay the rent!



When we put our total trust in God to provide for our basic needs we are expecting His love to pay our rent. 


Children don’t worry about the rent. In fact, rent isn’t on their radar. They have blind faith that their needs will be taken care of, because they trust their parent’s love for them.

As adults it’s difficult for us to put ourselves back in that innocent trusting mindset because we have been hurt so much by life experiences.

If we can listen to Jesus’ teaching and become as a little child life can be so much better.  

It’s not easy but it is possible. We must remember, God never asks us to do something He hasn’t already equipped us to do.

This is the truth: unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. In that kingdom, the most humble who are most like this child are the greatest.  ~ Matthew 18:3-4 (Voice)

How can I be more childlike?

  • Be more play-full and wonder-full.
  • Sit in the grass and look at the flowers.
  • Discover something new today.

Be alive, awake, aware, in awe of God’s creations around you!


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12 Principles of Recovery :: COURAGE

MY RECOVERY WORK THIS YEAR IS FOCUSED ON THE PRINCIPLES BEHIND THE 12 STEPS; ASKING KEY QUESTIONS THAT WILL HELP TO LEARN THESE CORE VALUES AND PUTTING THEM INTO PRACTICE. 

The 12 Steps are rules to memorize The 12 Principles are ingredients to a healthy life.**


STEP 7: 

Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.


PRINCIPLE 7: 

Courage


KEY QUESTION: 

What risks must I take?






Addicts are not strangers to risk. When living in my addiction I do many risky things; often putting others at risk. 



In recovery, our approach to risk changes completely. We learn to consider our risks instead of following our impulses. We consult our inner observer, then consciously choose which risks to take. One day at a time, we become both more courageous and more discerning. ~ Patrick Carnes**

It takes courage to:

  • Get out of bed and face reality each day.
  • Be open and vulnerable in our relationships. 
  • Make amends for our wrong doings. 
  • Have faith for an unknown future. 
  • Process our internal pain and fears.
  • Name and feel the feelings so long numbed.
  • Keep boundaries in place.
  • Do the next right thing.

 What am I risking with my courage?   Pain. Rejection. Uncertainty.

Bottom line: There is no courage without risk.


RESOURCES: 
A Gentle Path through the Twelve Principles: Living the Values Behind the Steps by Patrick Carnes ** 

 Image credit: [Jeanne Provost] © 123RF.com
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A Monk in the World :: SOLITUDE

EACH MONTH IN A MONK IN THE WORLD WE ARE LEARNING THE PRINCIPLES OF CHRISTIAN MONASTICISM AND HOW WE CAN APPLY THEM TO OUR LIVES OUTSIDE THE MONASTERY WALLS.


In ancient times the early monastic father’s heeded the call of the Holy Spirit and withdrew themselves into the Egyptian desert to battle their inner and outer demons. This type of solitude is unfamiliar and possibly frightening to most of us.


Modern humans haven’t a clue what true solitude entails. We are so consumed by the external chatter that we can’t hear our own thoughts much less the Holy Spirit.

Not only are many of us spiritually unconscious and deaf to God’s voice, society has taught us to create a false image; a self that is built around a compulsive need for admiration. At its core lies a trembling fear of failure. 

Solitude is the furnace where the transformation of this false self takes place; where we are transformed by Jesus Christ. 

For me solitude usually includes a book or a magazine, my dogs,  maybe some music. But this is not the transformative solitude that we are learning about here. Only when we can completely remove ourselves from social and worldly influences can we find the true healing. 

Henri Nouwen says the confrontation with our own frightening nothingness forces us to surrender ourselves totally and unconditionally to the Lord Jesus Christ.*

It’s up to us to create our own desert. We must set apart a time and place where we can tap into our inner hermit and find the healing presence of our Lord.

RESOURCES:
The Way of the Heart: Connecting with God Through Prayer, Wisdom, and Silence by Henri Nouwen*


Image credit: travnikovstudio / 123RF Stock Photo

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12 Steps of Humility :: RADICAL SELF-EXAMINATION

EACH MONTH IN THE 12 STEPS OF HUMILITY WE ARE CLIMBING SAINT BENEDICT’S LADDER OF HUMILITY.  WITH EACH RUNG WE COME CLOSER TO THE PERFECT LOVE OF GOD.


The ladder is our life on earth, if we humble our heart God will raise it to heaven. ~ St. Benedict 

THE SEVENTH STEP OF HUMILITY:
A monk not only admits with [her] tongue but believes in [her] heart that others are better than she is.



It is good for me that I was humbled so that I might learn your statutes. ~ Psalm 119:71

Again the ancient language of Saint Benedict goes against our grain and everything we are taught today. But without a doubt the Rule is Biblical!


This radical self-examination, seeing ourselves as inferior to others is not to be done in a self-deprecating, undervalued way. 

When we can find joy in seeing the value of others over ourselves we allow ourselves to be teachable.

“Once we stop pretending to be what we know we are not, we are free to except ourselves and except others as well…  In this acceptance of our own meager virtues and our own massive failures, we have a chance to understand the failures of others.  We have the opportunity to become kind.” ~ Joan Chittister*


The seventh step on Benedict’s ladder of humility is asking us to make room for personal growth. 



RESOURCES:
Twelve Steps to Inner Freedom: Humility Revisited by Joan Chittister*
A Guide to Living in the Truth: Saint Benedict’s Teaching on Humility by Michael Casey
Saint Benedict’s Toolbox: The Nuts and Bolts of Everyday Benedictine Living by Jane Tomaine
The Rule of Saint Benedict edited by Timothy Fry

Image credit: ximagination / 123RF Stock Photo

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BOOK REVIEW

THE DIVINE HOURS: Prayers for Summertime 


by 


Phyllis Tickle

 
 
 
 
For the last several months I have been using Phyllis Tickle’s prayer book series. I purchased the entire set which includes prayer books for each season of the year, along with a book of Night Offices. I started with Prayers for Springtime and have now moved to Prayers for Summertime.
 
If you are unfamiliar with Phyllis Tickle you will find her a prolific writer with dozens of books to her name. She is the founding editor of the Religion Department of Publishers Weekly and has been a much sought after speaker on religion in America.
 
In The Divine Hours Ms. Tickle makes primary use of The Book of Common Prayer, the writings of the Church Fathers and takes Scripture readings from the New Jerusalem Bible.  Each book is divided into specific time categories: Morning, Mid-day, Evening and Night and is easy to navigate to find today’s reading.
As a recovering addict it’s critical that I keep my prayer routine on track and The Divine Hours series has been most helpful in this area.  Although I have several prayer books and iPhone apps, I really enjoy Phyllis Tickle’s books and use them regularly. 
 
If you are looking for a way to freshen your prayer and praise routine while participating in the ancient practice of the liturgy, I highly recommend The Divine Hours by Phyllis Tickle.
 
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12 Principles of Recovery :: HONESTY

MY RECOVERY WORK THIS YEAR IS FOCUSED ON THE PRINCIPLES BEHIND THE 12 STEPS; ASKING KEY QUESTIONS THAT WILL HELP TO LEARN THESE CORE VALUES AND PUTTING THEM INTO PRACTICE. 




STEP 6: 
We were entirely ready to have God remove all these character defects.

PRINCIPLE SIX: Honesty

KEY QUESTION:
What must improve?




“When our addiction was the center of our world, we lived a double (or triple or quadruple) life. We said one thing and did another. We told different people different stories. We told ourselves contradictory stories. And we tried to keep track of it all. But of course we couldn’t. No one could. And eventually our world of lies and contradictions imploded.”  ~Dr. Patrick Carnes**


As a recovering addict, honesty is one of the most difficult yet critical things I must practice. After 10 years of recovery I’m still learning how to be honest.


To walk out Principle Six I have made a deal with myself. If I slip or struggle in my area of weakness I must be willing to admit it. Admitting it is far easier and less painful than the potential fall out that might come if it is discovered.

Our confession must not be used against us. We have to feel safe when sharing the weaknesses we have with others. It can’t be used as ammunition later.

The beauty of honesty is its simplicity. Life is much less complicated when we are able to be honest with ourselves and others.

Keeping a check on my self-talk is key. If I am tempted to, or actually do slip, I must ask:

What story am I creating in my mind around my behavior? 

Am I willing to accept the consequences that may come with the honesty that is needed?



RESOURCES: 
A Gentle Path through the Twelve Principles: Living the Values Behind the Steps by Patrick Carnes **

Image credit: iqoncept / 123RF Stock Photo